てほしい

I want you to, I’d like you to

Build a strong foundation of Japanese with a high-frequency grammar and real-world phrases.

てほしい is a Japanese grammatical structure used to express the speaker’s desire for someone else to perform an action. Attaching to the て-form of a verb, it conveys requests, wishes, or expectations with varying degrees of directness and emotion.

While commonly used in casual settings, てほしい can be softened with polite markers like んですが or んですけど in formal contexts, ensuring the request aligns with Japanese norms of politeness and consideration.

The negative form てほしくない allows speakers to express a desire for someone not to do something, further expanding its versatility.

Whether used for casual interactions or formal situations, てほしい is an essential tool for expressing personal desires while respecting the listener’s autonomy and maintaining harmonious communication.

Structure

Verb [ て ] + ほしい

Verb [ て ] + ほしい + です (polite)

Negative Form:

Verb [ ないで ] + ほしい⁽¹⁾

Verb [ て ] + ほしくない⁽¹⁾

⁽¹⁾ + です (polite)

JLPT Level

Key uses

1. Expressing a direct request or desire

てほしい is commonly used to directly state that the speaker wants someone else to perform an action. This use is straightforward and is most appropriate in casual or familiar contexts.

[ Additional Insight ]

While this use is effective for close relationships, it can feel too direct or even demanding in formal situations. Adding polite expressions like です or んですが is recommended to soften the tone when addressing acquaintances or superiors.

2. Indicating hope or expectation

てほしい can also express the speaker’s hope or expectation that someone will perform a specific action or that a certain outcome will occur.

[ Additional Insight ]

This use is common for expressing aspirations or positive wishes for group efforts or shared goals. It can convey a strong personal stake in the outcome.

3. Highlighting emotional attachment

てほしい often carries emotional nuance, conveying care, concern, or affection in requests. It is frequently used when the speaker feels emotionally invested in the desired outcome.

[ Additional Insight ]

This use is particularly meaningful in contexts where the speaker expresses concern for someone’s well-being, making it a common choice in empathetic or supportive conversations.

4. Making indirect requests or wishes

By combining てほしい with phrases like んですが or んですけど, the speaker can soften the request, making it feel less direct and more polite.

[ Additional Insight ]

This form is ideal for formal or professional settings, where maintaining respect and consideration is key. It aligns with the Japanese preference for indirect communication, ensuring the listener feels comfortable and not pressured.

5. Negative forms: Expressing what you don’t want

The negative forms てほしくない or ないでほしい are used to express what the speaker doesn’t want someone to do. These structures range from casual to emphatic, depending on tone and context.

[ Additional Insight ]

This form is effective for setting boundaries or expressing gentle disapproval without sounding overly harsh. Adding polite endings helps adapt the tone for different situations.

6. Expressing a desire for general situations

In addition to addressing specific individuals, てほしい can express a general wish or desire about broader situations or outcomes, even when not directed at a specific person.

[ Additional Insight ]

This use highlights universal hopes or aspirations that are not tied to a particular individual’s actions. It’s often used for reflective or idealistic statements.

Comparisons

1. てもらいたい

Both てほしい and てもらいたい express a desire for someone to do something, but てもらいたい is more formal and polite, often used in requests or explanations. Use てほしい for casual or emotional expressions, and てもらいたい for formal settings or when politeness is required.

2. たい

たい expresses the speaker’s own desire to do something, while てほしい expresses the desire for someone else to do something. Use たい when focusing on your own actions, and てほしい when wishing for someone else’s actions.